In the future, everyone will have rights within relationships. Dumpees will be able to sue for wrongful dismissal, or may belong to a union, where they will fight for the right to regular breakfast in bed and occasional 3am lifts home from town.
Should circumstances necessitate it, you will be able to make your spouse redundant, however severance may be payable, depending on the length of your relationship. Severance will, usually, be paid in guilt, and blame taking, in relationships where there was no financial dependency.
Beginning a relationship will necessitate interviews, during which time you would be expected to be “interviewing” as many people as possible. You would not be expected to interview anyone exclusively. Any prospective relationship itself would not be considered official until a contract is drawn up. Not so binding as marriage, which will be something mentioned only in fairy tales, and laughed about by adults.
During interview stage spouse descriptions should be drawn up, but more haphazard recruiters may prefer simply to discuss the role in interview. Both parties would bring their CV, and spouse description if available, to a date, and take it in turns to interview each other. Should a date lead to someone considering drawing up a contract, it would be entirely appropriate to approach the other persons exes, as referees.
Over all, people will find it easier to begin a relationship. No one will really talk about love any more, it wont be relevant. Instead they will discuss how their relationship is progressing, if it is going well, or not so well. People will, overall, find it easier to begin relationships. And their relationships will last longer. And although some will question why they need a relationship at all, overall people will be happier. Or less people will be unhappy. And aren’t they both the same thing?
Posts Tagged ‘future’
The future: part 4
The future: part 2
In the future people wont walk very often but hover with small, convenient hover packs on their backs. They will be no more intrusive than wearing shoes. It doesn’t matter that they burn less calories because people will be vaccinated against obesity at birth. The obesity vaccine will be developed in a collaboration between coca cola and kfc and will have a secret ingredient. Only ten people will know the secret ingredient. They will not be allowed to be in the same place at the same time. They will have special body guards. Other companies will devote billions to trying to trying to work out what the secret ingredient is. The obesity vaccine is big business.
The future: part 1
In the future people wont eat animals because scientists will have invented a translator that animals will wear so you can talk to your cat or your dog or your guineapig and the sheep and the cows and the chickens will all say “don’t eat me!” and become politicians and laws will be passed so that you cannot eat them but by then people wont mind because no one will want to eat something that says “don’t eat me!”. All the people that invest in tofu now will be very rich.
